Clean and Elegant

Clean and Elegant

Monday, 27 August 2012

Forever on the Lips

"Why do I always get the runs when I'm on the rag?"
We all have similarly compelling sentences and phrases that we hear or read once and that, like goodness and mercy, end up following us all the days of our lives.  I was eleven years old when I read the above sentence in the “ Ask Anything” column of Seventeen magazine.  At the time, I had never been on the rag.  But I had gotten the runs.  It was just a matter of time before I would get both at the same time.  Peanut Butter and Jam, my friend Fern calls this.  Every month, when the Peanut Butter and Jam comes, I ask, “Why do I always get the runs when I’m on the rag?”  I can’t remember the answer.  Only the question.
Another soul-permeating phrase of mine is, “A moment on the lips, forever on the hips.”  The first time I encountered this one was in Marya Hornbacher’s anorexia and bulimia memoir Wasted.  I read this just as I was beginning my anorexia and bulimia career and the pages, though excellently written served more as a how-to manual than offer any hope for healing or recovery.  And to this day, that lovely sentence about lips and hips remains with me.  It came from the lips of Marya Hornbacher’s teacher.  Marya had been kept after school for some reason.  Alone in the classroom, Marya ate a bag of Doritos, the only thing she had eaten for some time. 

That’s when her teacher uttered her magic hips and lips phrase.  So Marya went to the bathroom and puked up the Doritos. 

Wasted, by Marya Hornbacher I do believe that Marya Hornbacher had done very well in throwing her eating disorder away.  She is also a very talented writer, and in the many years since Wasted was published, she has written a number of riveting and Doritos-free books.   

I was never a big chips person.  Since meeting the Boatman, however, I’ve taken up corn chips.  And pita chips.  I prefer the broken ones at the bottom of the bag because then I don’t pay attention to how many I am eating.  That said, I’m allowed to eat as many as I want.  Sometimes there are chips are on my lips for very many moments.  I never ever throw them up and so far my hips have stayed exactly same size.  There is no Big-Fat-Chip-Belly either. But sometimes my hips complain of seething pain.  I do not think it is from the chips.  It has something to do with my pelvis, which everyone is tired of hearing about.  Still, when my hips hurt, I never stop talking about it.  Now we have a new catch-phrase:
“A moment on the hips, forever on the lips.”
And once my lips take hold of something, they shelter it for a long, long time.  Another phrase:
 “A moment on the lips, forever on the lips.” 
I’m sure you’ll get the idea and derive thousands of your own happy catch-phrases that you’ll be able to luxuriate in at any given moment.  I would love to hear what your lips come up with.  
The Day that Dr. Seuss died seems like only yesterday.
Hips, Lips, Chips.
Kino has Very Open Hips:

This Panda Bear is made out of Lips:

And the Boatman drew a Chip with Ruffles.

"Very Refreshing"  featuring Chip with Ruffles.  More Drawings by the Boatman at
He's Refreshing.  He's on Vacation.  And he never gets the runs when he's on the rag.
The Chip doesn't and neither does the Boatman.
I was going to go on a contractions diet, but then I decided I wouldn't
I wouldn't and I couldn't
I won't.

The End.

The High Vagina, Coming Soon

Exuberant Bodhisattva on Facebook
Twitter: @mypelvicfloor
I Let Go, by Erica J. Schmidt

The O's in the Totos have Hats
My name is Erica, I love coffee

No comments:

Post a Comment