Clean and Elegant

Clean and Elegant

Monday, 27 February 2012

The Drugstore Date

For nearly a fortnight, I have been meaning to tell you all about the lovely and romantic Valentine's Day that I enjoyed with the Boatman.  We went on a date to the drugstore.  This happens to be an excellent way to keep your romance alive.  You can go to the drugstore with your loved one any day of the year.  If you do not have a loved one, the drugstore is the perfect place for you to find romance.

During your drugstore date, take your time through every aisle. That's what me and the Boatman did. Hand and hand, we perused the Hair Aisle, the Tooth Aisle, the Bad Digestion Aisle, the Stationary Aisle, the Family Planning Aisle.  The options for conversation were endless:  how to choose the perfect pair of tweezers, the perfect toothbrush, the perfect comb.    We shared intimate details with each other like the Boatman's struggles with dandruff and my struggles with toenail fungus.  Some people might say that these two afflictions are two sides of the same coin!  That's why the Boatman and I are so meant for each other.

In the greeting card aisle, we each read aloud a Heartfelt Valentine which we would not purchase.  This way we got to express our Heartfelt Feelings without spending too much money.  As the Boatman read me the Heartfelt Valentine, my heart beat fast and I blushed.  Poetry always does that to me.  So does the Boatman.
Me and the Boatman, at the peak of our romance.
We are at the airport, one of our other favourite date spots.
One of the most exciting features of the Drugstore Date is blood pressure machine.  Don't miss out.  Me and the Boatman indulged while we were waiting for the pharmacist to fill out  the Boatman's prescription for blue cold sore pills.  (For his oyster-shaped cold sore)  The suspense while we were waiting for the cuff to inflate was excruciating. My blood pressure was lower than the Boatman's, but my pulse was higher.  It must have been the heartfelt poetry.

If ever your romance wears out (which will never happen for me, but I try to think of others besides myself) , the blood pressure machine will always be there for you.  Most drugstores are open twenty-four hours a day.  What a gift.  While the cuff is inflating, you can smile at the cute white-coated pharmacist behind the counter.  He or she will be happy to answer your questions about kidney disease or thyroid inflammation.  This kind of discussion is always a real treat.

At our Drugstore Date, the Boatman and I got to wait in two line-ups.  One for the blue cold sore pills, and the regular lineup where we purchased one another's Special Gifts.  The Boatman's Special Gift to me was an emery board for my toenail fungus, a tube of toothpaste and paint-by-number eye shadow.  My Special Gift to the Boatman was an emery board even though he doesn't have toenail fungus, brandname Q-tips, and unscented aluminum-free biodegradable deodorant.   Standing in the lineup with the Boatman was just plain titillating.

Please note:  If you are going on a Drugstore Date by yourself, be sure to buy yourself a Special Gift. Choose something satisfying yet unregrettable.  Some trail mix, travel-sized vaseline, rechargeable batteries or a bottle of Perrier.  I myself am partial to brandname Q-tips, but only you can decide which Special Gift will do. 
Brandname Q-tips from Days Gone By
Some people think that when you fall in love, you become boring to hang out with.  That's totally bogus.  Me and my life are more interesting than ever.  The Drug Store Date is proof.
The End.

Exuberant Bodhisattva on Facebook
Twitter: @mypelvicfloor
I Let Go, self-help book by Erica J. Schmidt

The Kiss Test
Why I am like Jane Fonda
Mythological, Unconditional Love